Back to The Basics

Okay, so I haven't actually wrote a blog in.... forever but that doesn't really mean much. There has been so much going on, its hard to put it all down... Uggghhhh Nate.... He has been playing with my heart so much. All I've done was gone along with it... I'm so heartbroken but yet I love him to death. I don't think I can really love anyone else... It just feels right whenever I'm with him.

But besides that, life at home this summer has been very strage. Jess moved out and back in with dad. We have our own rooms now and its more peacful then usual. I have to get ready for school starting back up soon. Joy.... and I hope it'll be less painful then freshman year.


Fingers crossed... ~Lyssy

There's More and More to Everything

Well, last day of school, we're all happy for that... But what will I do this summer you ask? Come to think of it, I'm not sure. I want to have a good time. I want to be with friends and just do whatever. The thing is, I can now. Nate and I are going through a break. I do miss him, and I do care about him, but no matter what, I can't be faithful. It really hurts me knowing I have been playing with his heart. I don't want to at all but if I am with him, it'll only make things worse.

Anyways, life hasn't been treating me the best but I guess I'll have to take life as it comes and grab it by the horns.... Mom and dad constantly argue. I may not see dad for a while after father's day. It's difficult and I hope my heart heals and gets better soon.... I have to go, laterz

Library

At the moment I am at the library and I am still trying to get through life in one peice. Mom and Jess have been arguing on and off and so have dad and Jess. It's really stressful because I have to hear it all the time but then again it's just stupid crap in the first place that they are arguing about. I am currently on meebo.com waiting patiently for Nate to get on. Our relationship has been pretty bumpy and I only wish it will work out good soon. A few guys like me at the moment and I'm not sure who all of em are but it does add on just a little bit more stress. Hopefully I won't fall for anyone like I think I will. Nate is far too important to me and he's helping me stay in one peice. Other then that nothing big is going on. My grades still suck more then anything and it really sticks. Later blog, can't wait to write more

Hehehe

well its me again...posting here....im bored and im watching disney chanel...earlier i watched spinal tap and was all like "woah!!!"


well yeah


i got my english paper done, so im all like "woah"


hehe


well yeah

peace, mike

More to Life

Things are still moving on. I'm at mom's this week, getting a ride to and from school everyday. It's not that bad because I get to go to Loy Norrix and seee some old friends from Maple Street. My grades in school are not the best though... Mr. Hubbard gave me an F and in all my other classes I have a D. It really stinks that I am failing in school this much. The good news is that Kelcey and I are finally BFFs again. It feels great that she still cares. With life, not so much but when it's me and her, it's unbreakable. n.n Nate and I are doing fine. Thursday we had a bit of a bump in our realtionship but we got through it in a day or so. Him and I are worried that I will fall for another guy... It's a bit rough for me because I know deep down I still miss him and want him back but I also know I can't hurt Nate. His heart would break into so many peices if I did something so shallow.

Hopefully things in my life will get a bit better then they are now.... but all I can do is hope.

La De Da De Dum

Well things are going well enough...

I got hit by a car as many of you may have heard...

Im fine, and my wounds are healing nicely...

Well yeah...

I miss kyle... He hasnt called any of us here...

Peace, mike

Life

It just isn't working out for me right now. I'm confused, hurt, angry, and depressed. Mom and dad aren't arguing or anyhting but I am staying at dad's for a week or so because mom's van isn't working. It's really going to be difficult for me because I'm getting short on cash and I have to walk my route all this week. Not to mention, I'll be without mom and she is short on cash too. Yeah, things aren't easy like I want them to be. Not to mention Kelc is really pissed off at me. I tried to tell her how I felt and what's going on, and she still cares about herself. I want to be her best friend... I am her best friend, but slowly she's pushing me away. I tell her my plans never work out. With Nate and I they barely work and with Kelc and I, I want them to work. I love Kelc like she's my sis and she won't even give me time to get my life straightened out. I'm still really upset that the van broke down and I can't be with mom. At least dad still has the computer so I will get to talk to my friends online and catch up on some things. Right now I'm pretty sick and tired of what has been going on. My life is just so different now and everything is going downhill. Well, not like it hasn't before but this is just completly different from my past. Nate and I are still a good couple. Wed still love eachothjer with all our heart. It's just that Kelcey is actually jealous of me and she wants the relationship like I have. I want her to be somewhat happier then she is now because I hate to see her hurt like this. Now I am hurt over it and It'll just stress me out more. I don't need this right now. If she wants to be mad at me because I told her how I felt, then there isn't really anything else I can do... I mean, I know her life must have been way worse then mine. She told me alot. But that doesn't mean that you add on more stress to your best friend.... Who knows, she probly hates my guts by now. I'm really sorry this happened between me and her but she doesn't understand that Nate keeps me together. Not to mention, my plans always get screwed up. basically, nothing ever works for me til the last minute. Friday I really wanted her to stay with me; mom said no. Saturday, she was busy when I wasn't; and mom said no again because the van broke down. And finally, sunday we still didn't have the van and I did not know when dad was goign to pick me up. Things are hard right now, I want Kelcey to get that... If she doesn't...I dunno what else to do.

Everything Part 2

so, things with home are a little different then I thought they would be. First of all, mom did find an apartment. It's in Portage which makes me closer to Nate. I still go to K Central because I would never leave my BFF's. I miss Kyle like crazy though! He is in Wisconson probly missing me and kelc like crazy too. Kelcey is still as heartbroken as ever and I have no idea with what I am going to do with her. Hopefully, and putting an emphasis to that word, I really hope things will get better for her. Things are okay for me I suppose, just my mom's apartment is a bit on the boring side. me and mom are saving up to buy a laptop. We are going to have a home phone and internet hoked up in the next couple days and that makes me really happy. I just recently checked my bank account on the school comp and unfortunatley I have no paycheck yet. Maybe I will get it tomorrow or monday. I'm really hoping tomorrow that way me and kelc and Nate can go out and do something over the weekend. Either way, I have alot ot get with my check and these next couple days I am going to be stressed and busy. *long sigh* All I know now is, things could be worse. I won't think of that now, but I do know things can get much worse.


In conclusion, Grades are still failing, my educational career is probly screwed, and I have alot to get done with my life.

Two Scorpio's Together <3

When two Scorpions make a love match, it is a fierce tempest of intense passion. Both are obsessed with one another, and they move forward in love, sex and romance at an accelerated -- some would say foolish -- way. Personal relations are positively steamy but, to the equal and opposite extreme, disputes will also be frenetically powerful. This relationship could go either way: It will either be the most wonderful thing in the world or a destruction of both involved.

The romantic merger of two sexy Scorpions can bring out the best in both love mates; each will use their intense emotional and intuitive natures to love their partner very deeply. Resolve and passion will keep these two together. The most powerful and threatening external forces will have a difficult time intruding on the happiness of a truly committed Scorpio couple. If they can wrangle their ardent energies, this power pair can set off fireworks.

The Planets Mars and Pluto rule Scorpio. Mars is the ancient God of War, always charging forward -- passionate, aggressive and courageous. Pluto is the higher octave of Mars and controls the power, destruction and rebirthing elements of the Scorpio-Scorpio relationship. These two planets together allow the Scorpion to bounce back after disappointments or tragic losses. Fortunately for the Scorpion, intense passions inflate the importance and loss of everything.

Scorpio is a Water Sign, so their first instinct in love is to respond deeply, passionately, fervently, and if they decide to express themselves, its never done halfway. Scorpios should commit themselves to this goal: Tame the vengeful or vindictive side of their intuitive personalities, and to celebrate the extreme ups and quickly forget the downs. A Scorpio must let go and really say what they want, what they feel, what they need, to their love mates. Pent-up emotions can become toxic, frustrating the one feeling them and confusing the one wondering about them. Because both are so devoted, jealousy may become an issue. Be strong, brave Scorpios, and overcome this hurdle together!

Scorpio is a Fixed Sign. Idea shortages are never an issue with this pair. No couch potato couple this one -- they like to stay active, and they'll accomplish much together. They share a knack for investments and risks -- calculated ones, that is. A Scorpio couple will thoroughly research and investigate an idea if that's what it requires. Once Scorpio love mates set their eyes on the prize, that's it -- it's theirs.

What's the best thing about a Scorpio-Scorpio love match? The intensity of love that this couple can feel. They're very goal-oriented, and their shared power makes them an incomparable, unconquerable duo! Utter devotion ensures that this relationship will continue for a long time.


http://love.astrology.com/features/astrology/lovematch/scorpioscorpio.html

Everything

Well..................

Here I am back in comp info with absolutley nothing to do. (not really cause I actually do have things to do, I'm just lazy...) Anywho, life at home is going a bit stranger (in a good way)then normal. It's really creepy. Mom finally found an apartment to live in. Housing Resources inc. is helping her pay rent but other then that she's taking my sis with her! Hehe. I'm spending the weekend with her and I hope Nate will be able to come over and help us move. I'll still be living with dad, but only on the days I have to go to school. Mom wanted to take me to Portage Northern at first, and sure I'll be with a few friends but I can't leave everyone at K Central!! Don't worry, I'm not, my mom just worried me a bit. But ya, the whole pool party I am planning in June is still trying to develop, but it'll take a lot of talking and convincing with dad... Mom has been worried about me lately. She thinks whenever I come to her stressed out, I'll cut myself afterwords. I'm not like that now! I have been taking my meds and Nate and I are perfect right now. The only thing I'm really missing is more time with mom. Which I will get that when summer comes but it seems like ever since dad kicked her out, she's more different then usual.
I'm okay with that, I mean she's happy n all, but that one little thing I can't put my mind to is diffferent about her. I shouldn't worry bout it too much. After all, she is my mom, and I think she loves me more then enough. School has been fine. I caught a cold over the weekend so I was absent Monday (sorry, all my teachers). At least I got some sleep but again today i am feeling crappy like yesterday. Plus I was a little ticked because Nate and I didn't talk as much as i really wanted to. Now he'll be busy tonight and I'll probly be bored out of mind...

More time is going by in comp info. Nothing really happened today except for a fight in the cafe'. I laughed for like two seconds because they are stupid for fighting in the first place but other then that I had food to focus on. Speaking of food, my appetite(sp?) was toast today. I mean there was nothing there and I didn't even touch my sub. If that's not weird that I'm not eating, then I dunno what is.

Maybe it's my sickness and that I was really really pissed off this morning. Okay, not that ticked but you know. In the beggining of the year kinda, Kelc and I had these conflicts with this group of girls that wanted to start things with us and get us to fight and all that. We went straight to Mr. Hawkins because we knew it was the right thing to do. he talked to them I think and we thought we had everything worked out. last week, Sam gave kelc a note saying all these things to put her down. basically she was miss fake friend and didn't care... but yeah, Kelc showed me the note and I was ticked. Sam had no reason to tell Kelcey that they were best friends and she loved her like a sis. Somehow, this news got to the 'gang' of girls who were bugging us the first time. They came to us in Sunshine's room(mike said that: it's Mr. Kolasinski), trying to start MORE with us. Kelcey and I were already in a crappy mood. Her boyfriend broke up with her last night FROM A MYSPACE MESSAGE.... That can't get anymore low can it?! I felt so bad for her too because her grandfather just recently died. But we asked these girls as politley as we could if they could leave us alone. Kelc was already crying and I was already pissed off that they even thought of bothering us. Thankfully, we got through the day. She cut herself a few times (which I was upset about) but no matter what, I always stuck by her today.


Hopefully, she'll get better and start taking her meds again, but then again I do too. I haven't been as bad, but i do know I need to take care of myself. I love my life and I love my friends too much to let them get hurt.

It's almost 2:20, that means I get to go home and get my paper route done. Afterwords, if Nate's in a good mood, I'll call him. Him and I are doing great by the way. If I were without him, I'd probly just want to die... That's beside the point. I think my thoughts are pretty much summed up for today. I actually mentally feel much better that I typed my heart out. Peace out (as mike would say xD) laterz

It's me again!!!

Yo...Im posting here again....

Nothing special...just checking in with all my peeps on alyssa's blogg...

Yepp



Peace, Mike

Alyssa back again

I'm back in computer info and it's boring again.... Plus I'm thirsty and my back hurts. Dx Butt fuck... hopefully when i get home things won't go too wrong. Before I went to bed, Jess and dad would not stop arguing and I wanted to smack the both of em... But yeah, that'll be it for today

Well I'm Mike

Im posting on Alyssa's blog!!!


Oh Em Gee!!!


Well yeah, I'm Mike...and Alyssa is sittinging next to me right now...


Thats about it...


Peace, Mike

Spring Break

Spring break is over! It sucks... I was having such a great time sleeping in, and being lazy all day. Plus me and my boyfriend spent soooo much time together. I was happy. Too bad he kinda passed out on friday and his head busted open... He has three staples in his head now and he'll be on vicoden for a while. When he got back from the hospital, he looked so high thanks to morphine! *sigh* I really hope he gets better soon, I hear it hurts more when they take the staples out instead of when they put them in. Well, now I'm back to school. Back to getting up early, and back to trying to be a sucess. It's not like it's gonna happen to me anyways!

I just...

I just cut my arm up real bad with a razor. Does that make me a bad person? I didn't tell my boyfriend I did it, that is breaking too many promises and he would get really upset. But I actually feel better. One moment I'm crying my eyes out, and the next I'm in my bathroom thinking about death, leaving another cut on my wrist and I feel fine. All the pain that is left now is a sting like feeling where I put the band aid. It was bleeding alot and I couldn't just cover it up with a sweatshirt. Maybe I have more problems then I thought... I tell my parents and by boyfriend all the time, 'I belong in the psyco hospital.' You know what they say? No you don't, or you don't belong there, you only think you do. It sucks! I don't deserve people telling me I'm wrong when I know dam weel I'm right. Besides, I think I'm correct about my own mind.

Coputer Info

BORING!

Ms. H is a great teacher, that's no doubt. But the class itself is to--too much of a breeze. Every assignment I do is done in a jiff unless it's micro type pro. { Micro type pro: 1997 program where it teaches you to type faster... } Uh, yeah, I'm not faster ! I am slow and lazy, that's how I like it... The excel assignments are the best. I love working with instructions and steps to get work done. The only problem is, Ms. H has to make them easy for the *cough* slower students... I think all I really need is a motive or a challenge... Something to boost up my spirit and make me get off my lazy a$$ and work. { Yes, all this is pure honesty... unfortunate for teachers... } But ya know, that's life. You'll always find this stubborn student who wants all this crap. Oh joy...

Sex and Coffee

Hmm. Sex in coffee grounds. The smells, the touch, the mood. Man, that sounds fun. I found the following image {which had to be removed for an odd reason} while browsing through blogs. I am not sure who (ower of blog) he or she was, but they like coffee, and they sure like to blog... I was just talking this over with my boyfriend online, and he likes it... n_n Lucky for me, eh? Oh yush... xD

First Blog

First blog...not much but yeah... keep up the comments!